Cousins.

  I was close with mine. Very close. The kind of close where I’d be in my bed, ready for the weekend to start, to only bolt in terror when my bedroom door rushed open to reveal the toothy grins of my cousins.

  I saw them practically every weekend. Sleepovers, scraped knees, stolen snacks, secret getaways, runs of terror in the dark, and hushed conversations when we were supposed to be asleep. I’m pretty sure I was their favorite cousin.

  They were mine too.

  We had fun. A lot of fun.

  But you know how it goes.

  We grew up.

  And somewhere between homework getting harder and phones getting smarter, we started seeing each other less and less. A weekly ritual turned into a monthly obligation. Then a “see you next time” turned into a distant memory.

  Every meeting started to come with this thin layer of awkwardness. Like that plastic wrap you use to cover food was now stretched over our mouths as we tried to breath freely. We’d sit across from each other and try to smile.

  “So……how’s school?”

  “Good. You?”

  “Yeah. Good.”

  “Cool.”

  And beneath it all, we both knew.

  We were still here. But that didn’t stop it from slipping.

  What we were holding onto weren’t whole memories anymore. They were scraps.

  Then it changed again.

  Weeks turned into months. Months could’ve turned into years. Hell, sometimes it feels like it’s really going to turn into years.

  And then one day, it has been years.

  Now there’s a special occasion. Maybe someone graduated. Maybe there’s a wedding. Maybe someone died. It almost doesn’t matter what it is, since it's always the kind of event that gathers everyone whether they’re ready or not.

  And now you’re in the car.

  And you can’t stop thinking.

  Do they still remember you?

  You shift in your seat, knee bouncing. The seatbelt suddenly feels too tight. You unlock your phone. Lock it again. Unlock it. Scroll mindlessly through that app as you’re not even really reading anything. Just swiping to pass time.

  You don’t even feel like playing a game. You don’t want music either. You just want this.

  You just want the car ride to stretch forever.

  Because as long as you’re in the car, the question is still a question.

  Will you embarrass yourself?

  If they don’t remember you, what are you even supposed to do? Reintroduce yourself? “Hey, remember me? We used to share juice boxes and fight over the blue controller.”

  And it’s not like you’ve changed much either.

  You never do.

  Then the car stops. You step out.

  And when you finally come face to face with them, your greatest fears are confirmed.

  It’s awkward. Painfully, predictably awkward.

  You look at her first.

  Wow. Look how pretty she’s gotten. Is that really her?

  Didn’t she used to be a tomboy? You two used to wrestle on the dining room table while your moms screamed from the kitchen. You both got your ears pulled for that. You lost every match, by the way. She was stronger than you. Don’t pretend she wasn’t.

  “Three out of three!” she used to shout, pinning you down while you dramatically gasped for air. “Tap out!”

  She was smarter too. She always rubbed it in, didn’t she?

  And now look at her.

  She’s wearing a dress. And is that……makeup? Her hair is done in a way that looks effortless but definitely wasn’t. She laughs with someone else and brushes a strand behind her ear and for a second you feel like you’re looking at a stranger.

  These are things you never would’ve expected her to do.

  But of course she changed.

  And then there’s him. Little man. Her little brother. Your little cousin.

  He’s taller than you now.

  You blink.

  Wait, seriously? There’s no way.

  That’s him?

  But it is him.

  He’s probably stronger than you too. That’s what your brain instantly thinks. Isn’t that insane? You and his sister used to tower over him. He was just this annoying little kid who waddled after you when you went outside.

  When you went biking with her, he’d slam himself onto the pavement dramatically. “I WANNA COME!” He would bawl while crying his eyes out.

  You’d look at each other, whisper “Go, go, go,” and pedal away like criminals fleeing a crime scene.

  He’d throw fits every single time.

  You started including him more when you got older.

  You did.

  But look at him now.

  He’s bigger than you.

  So is he the one behind now?

  And then you catch their eyes.

  You know what they’re thinking.

  He hasn’t changed one bit.

  ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

  “You’ve gotten so good with the sword!” Elara gushed.

  “When did you get so many summons?” Roland asked with a wide grin, like I’d just revealed I’d been secretly taming dragons and other super powerful beasts.

  “And when did you befriend a spirit?” Selene inquired, her eyes narrowing with a familiar, childlike curiosity and wonder.

  It was questions like these that barraged me, rapid-fire, overlapping, stepping over each other in their rush to fill the years we hadn’t shared. They were questions born from the absence of seeing each other. From the slow, quiet stretch of time that had wedged itself between us.

  Questions that needed answers.

  Answers that could bridge the gap and make things normal again.

  And I answered them.

  I answered just as I always did, with a few jokes here and there, trying to keep things light and smooth.

  But after the answers ran out, what else was there for me to say?

  I could see it in them. They wanted to ask so much more. They wanted to know more.

  They just wanted to talk to me.

  They missed me.

  I did too.

  But, I’m sorry. I can’t do this right now.

  So I did what I’ve always been good at.

  I redirected them, subtly steering the current of conversation away from myself and toward my siblings and parents. I nudged here, added a comment there, positioned them all until, almost unconsciously, groups began to form.

  “You’ve grown up a lot, Arthur!” Roland grinned, slinging an arm around Arthur’s shoulder.

  Arthur let out a laugh as Roland gave him a light noogie. “I’m still growing, too. I think I’ll be even taller than you soon.”

  “Slow down, kid,” Roland said, releasing him with mock solemnity. Then his eyes flicked toward me. “Beric here could surpass you in height soon too, you know.”

  Arthur made a face. “I don’t know about that one.”

  “I’m not seeing much muscle either,” Roland judged, giving Arthur’s back a firm smack.

  Arthur straightened immediately. “I do have some. It’s just in my legs.”

  “Oh?” Roland hummed dramatically. “The infamous racer. Are you joining this year’s?”

  Arthur waved a hand. “Nah. They banned me.”

  Roland blinked. “For what?”

  Dad slid in smoothly. “This boy here lost his way and somehow dashed straight through an entire pen of cattle. Do you remember that?”

  Arthur groaned. “The signs were confusing.”

  Roland stared at him for half a second before exploding into laughter. “Oh, that was you?” He doubled over, clutching his stomach. “My parents nearly lost their minds trying to pay for the damages!”

  Arthur muttered, “They shouldn’t have put the pen near the race route…….”

  That effortless back-and-forth. The easy laughter. The way the silence never stretches too long before someone fills it.

  They’re so good at it.

  It’s kind of annoying.

  Nearby, Elara had already been absorbed into conversation with Mom.

  “That bracelet is adorable,” Elara noted, gently lifting Mom’s wrist to get a better look. “The craftsmanship is so delicate!”

  “Isn’t it?” Mom beamed. “It was only a bronze coin! Oh, you should see the shirt I found for Beric. The stitching is wonderful.”

  “I need to show you what I picked up for Selene,” Elara said eagerly. “There were so many cute stalls this year. The festival’s bigger than last time, don’t you think?”

  They were off, discussing festival food, fabrics, sales, which stall had the best honey cakes, which ones overcharged. They especially talked about us, about how much we’d grown, what we were like as children, embarrassing details included.

  It reminded me of being dragged through the store as a kid.

  You’d spend what felt like hours pushing the cart while your mom inspected every fruit. You’d swear she’d picked out vegetables solely because you hated them.

  And just when you thought you were finally done, get home and get on the game, spend the rest of the day while calling your friends, of course, no, it couldn’t be that easy.

  Disaster has struck.

  Because she had spotted a friend.

  And you knew there was no escaping it.

  So you’d stand there, hands still on the cart, staring into the void while they caught up on five generations’ worth of gossip.

  “That’s exactly what I told him,” Mom laughed now.

  “Oh, you were right to,” Elara replied solemnly.

  On the other side, Selene had cornered Elaine.

  “Your hair’s so silky,” Selene complimented, gently running her fingers through it. “How do you take care of it?”

  “Just water and the mixture Beric made for us,” Elaine replied plainly.

  Selene’s head snapped toward me. “Mixture?”

  It was just something aloe-vera-like from the plants near the creek.

  “I’ll have to try it for myself.” Selene’s eyes sparkled.

  The groups had settled, and the lines had been drawn.

  It was decided who belonged where.

  And I was exactly where I always ended up.

  Stolen content warning: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

  Watching.

  The attention shifted fully onto them, and I took advantage of the opening. I stepped back once. Then another. Then I slipped sideways into the moving sea of festival-goers until their laughter blended into the crowd.

  My turn had already passed.

  Are you really fine with this?

  I glanced sideways.

  Sys hovered near my shoulder.

  I get why, but to Roland, Elara, and Selene as well? Do they deserve it?

  I didn’t know how to answer.

  For some reason, I could tell that they changed. They were still mostly the same people, but they had grown. They had changed.

  And then there’s me. Still thinking about all of this.

  I just can’t help but feel like I’ll make things weird if I stay.

  I always do. I did it back then too.

  And I’m doing it right now with you.

  The streets had mostly returned to normal. Kids zoomed past like grounded jets finally cleared for takeoff. Stalls reopened fully, merchants shouting about fresh skewers and sweet cakes. The warm, buzzing rhythm of the festival resumed its natural pace.

  But there were still lingering eyes.

  On my family.

  I asked aloud a “normal” question.

  “Is it normal for the count and his family to be so buddy-buddy with commoners?”

  Roland specifically is known to be like this. Though, this level is a bit bold. But not all nobles are like that.

  Like Earl Wills.

  That man was barely disguising his disdain while shaking hands with commoners earlier. His smile had all the warmth of a brick wall. Every polite nod looked like it cost him actual physical pain.

  I watched him now from a distance, adjusting his cuffs as though contact with the general populace was taking years off his life.

  *urgh*

  Speaking of the devil, the man just bumped himself into me.

  “Blasted commoners—” I heard Earl Wills snap under his breath, brushing off his sleeve as though someone had just coughed on him.

  I was already preparing to excuse myself. A quiet step back, a polite nod, then disappear into the crowd like a background character. That’s all I need to do.

  But his eyes locked onto mine.

  “You’re Beric Bome,” he said, incredulity creeping into his tone.

  Damn.

  “Earl Wills,” I replied, dipping my head politely.

  He broke into a bright grin and extended his hand. “I enjoyed your fight against Malo.”

  Of course.

  I took his hand. “Thank you.”

  “I tell you,” he continued smoothly, still holding my hand a fraction longer than necessary, “if you ever considered pursuing a respectable profession, my inner guard of knights would always have room for a talent like you.”

  I forced a small laugh. “Thank you for the offer, but I’d actually like to become an adventurer in the future.”

  He clicked his tongue as he released me. “An adventurer? Such a waste.” He gestured broadly. “Do you see the knights around you?”

  Of course I did. There were knights everywhere. Even back at the festival entrance, I’d counted more than usual. But here? Around the nobles? There were more.

  “They are of the highest order in the entire province,” he said proudly. “Every single one was personally selected by me. Their sole duty is ensuring the safety of the nobility of Therandor.” He leaned in slightly. “And as such, if one desired such a high role, it would do them well to form an amicable relationship with me.”

  Ah.

  I raised my hand lightly. “No, I’m okay.”

  He blinked.

  I don’t think he’s used to that.

  “Are you sure?” he pressed, smile tightening.

  “I’m just a kid,” I said with a small shrug. “I’m grateful for the opportunity, really, but I—”

  Wait. There’s something on my hand.

  “……Is that ink?”

  I brought my hand closer to my face.

  It was faint. Just the slightest smudge along my palm and fingers. So light I could’ve missed it if my eyes weren’t used to such small marks.

  But it was definitely ink.

  How—

  “What is it?” Earl Wills asked, noticing my attention had drifted.

  “…….I think your ink rubbed off on my hand,” I said slowly, turning my palm to show him.

  It was just a trace. A small, almost insignificant smear.

  The kind most people wouldn’t even notice.

  He stared. And for a split second, he didn’t react.

  Then something shifted.

  “That wasn’t me,” he said too quickly. “It’s nothing.” His eyes flicked down to his own fingers.

  “Earl Wills?” I prompted.

  It was like someone had flipped a switch.

  The polished arrogance melted into something erratic. His jaw tightened.

  “I must attend to something,” he said abruptly.

  And before I could even form another question, he excused himself and hurried away.

  I stood there, hand still raised.

  And he’s gone.

  I glanced down at the ink again.

  It had to have come from him. We’d just shaken hands.

  So why react like that?

  Nobles don’t usually write their own messages.

  I looked at Sys.

  Most nobles dictate out loud to personal scribes. They don’t stain their own fingers as that’s “beneath them”.

  But there had been ink on his hands. It was faint though, like he’d tried to wash it off.

  Which means he wrote something. Recently. And he didn’t want anyone to know.

  He was writing in secret.

  But hy would a noble secretly write something during a public festival, surrounded by guards he personally selected?

  What requires secrecy from your own scribes?

  “What do you think of it?” A man’s voice came from behind.

  I turned instantly.

  I don’t know what it was about his voice, but the calm and wistful nature somehow held a power that made me want to instantly obey.

  He had features similar to Roland. He had the same general complexion, same easy smile carved into his face like it belonged there permanently. But his hair was darker and shorter, his frame taller and more filled out, and his eyes were a deep brown instead of Roland’s brighter hue. And he wore a long cloak that made him seem bigger than what he actually was.

  He looks familiar.

  What’s up with these weird encounters today?

  I cleared my throat. “Can I help you?”

  He didn’t answer directly. Instead, he looked out over the festival.

  “This festival,” he began, “is a time of peace and prosperity. Not one thought is wasted on grief or misfortune. Only reassurance that things have gotten better, and that they will continue to get better.”

  A pair of kids barreled between us, laughing, nearly colliding with his cloak. He stepped back gracefully, not even breaking his flow.

  “Every mouth is inclined toward a smile,” he continued, “at the bright future visible in the joined hands of children who run amok through the city.”

  He watched them go. “Every breath is spared for kind words. Every step taken to ensure we walk the same path. It is because of the care and love poured into the crops that bloom for today, the sweat and blood shed to make the tournament so spectacular, and the endurance we value so deeply……..that this festival came into being.”

  He really likes this festival.

  He must’ve written the brochure for it.

  He glanced down briefly before continuing. “Every five years, it serves as a form of salvation. For those who live beyond these walls. For those who risk monsters and bandits in the woods. For those who bruise their hands to grow their own food. For them, finally……it arrives.”

  His gaze swept the crowd. “A small period of time that, simply because of its origin, makes everything before it feel worth enduring.”

  I nodded slowly.

  I did not understand where this was going.

  He looked at me again. “As such……is the festival worth it?”

  Uh.

  “Was it worth doing what you had to do to live?” he pressed softly. “Is the sight before you enough to justify rising each morning? Is everything……..okay now, simply because you made it here?”

  His expression shifted.

  “Is this it?”

  I didn’t answer, mostly because I was just confused.

  “If such a festival is possible,” he went on, gesturing to the crowd, “where every child may laugh freely, where any race may walk unburdened, where status does not deny one a meal, where none need fear being wronged, then what restricts such a world to merely a festival?”

  He turned fully toward me.

  “What is it, Beric?”

  ………Huh?! Dude, I don’t freaking know. You materialized out of thin air like Noll during a jump scare and just unloaded a monologue on me. And how do you know my name? Is he another noble? I don’t recognize him.

  He’s staring at you like he genuinely expects an answer.

  His cloak fluttered briefly as he turned back toward the crowd.

  “If such a world were possible, what would you do for it?”

  He’s not leaving until you say something.

  Agh. What am I even supposed to say here? Does he want me to just glaze the hell out of the festival or something?

  I swallowed. “I don’t……think it’s possible.”

  Let’s just go with that.

  He stiffened slightly. “…….Really?”

  “I don’t fully understand what you’re asking,” I admitted. “But if you’re talking about some perfect world where everything is like this all the time, then no. Absolutely not. It’ll never happen.”

  Okay. That might’ve been a little blunt.

  He looked saddened by my words. “I see.”

  Great. Now I made him sad.

  I rubbed the back of my neck.

  I never know the right words for these things. I always make the other person feel like shit.

  But……fine. Just this once.

  I’ll try.

  “But,” I added, shifting my weight, “it’s still okay to dream about one.”

  His eyes sharpened. “Dream?”

  I had a feeling he had some strong feelings about the festival.

  “It’s thanks to that dream that something like this exists at all,” I said, gesturing around us. “Someone had to imagine it first. Someone had to think it was worth trying.”

  I didn’t have some deep emotional attachment to it. But even I could see the effort.

  The decorations, the food, the way care was put into making sure the guards seemed trustworthy and not imposing, and the way kids from every corner of the province ran together like differences didn’t exist.

  It was nice to see.

  “With enough people holding onto that idea,” I continued slowly, “maybe it won’t ever be perfect. But maybe it could last longer than a few days.”

  He looked at me intently.

  Then, a small twitch formed at the corner of his mouth.

  “Uncle Fale!”

  Both of us turned as Selene came rushing toward us, her skirt gathered in her hands as she leapt straight into the man’s arms.

  Oh. That’s who he is.

  “What is it this time, Sys?”

  He’s Roland’s older brother. He serves as his advisor. Political matters, civil matters, financial oversights, you know, the whole supporter shebang.

  “So he’s the one telling Roland all the problems and possible solutions whenever the province gets messed up.”

  Yeah. He’s kind of like me to you.

  I felt bad for Roland immediately.

  “How are you doing?” Fale asked warmly, pinching Selene’s cheek.

  “I’m great! But I thought you were too busy for the parade,” she said.

  “I wanted to meet Beric for myself,” he replied smoothly as he set her down. Then, to me, “I apologize for my introduction. I found you quite interesting.”

  Selene spun toward me with an excited smile. “Beric, this is my Uncle Fale. He helps my parents with the affairs of the common folk and financial issues. He’s done so much for us, and he’s watched out for me ever since I was little.”

  So he’s the brain.

  “It’s nice to meet you, sir,” I said politely.

  “Uncle Fale, you saw Beric fight, right?” Selene continued, eyes sparkling. “Wasn’t he so cool? Do you remember all those summons?”

  Fale chuckled. “I did.”

  “Beric, I still can’t believe you beat Malo,” she said, stepping closer to me.

  I instinctively stepped back. “I can’t either. It’s…….crazy.”

  Please go away.

  “…….Yeah, I……guess so.” she said softly.

  I looked at her properly then.

  Her smile had faltered.

  She noticed.

  And before I could somehow make it worse, because I absolutely would have, someone called her name from the stalls.

  She glanced between us, forced a quick smile, bowed lightly, and hurried off.

  I think I was relieved. Which makes me feel worse.

  Now it was just us again.

  “Beric.”

  Of course it wasn’t over.

  “The sight before us, ” Fale began quietly, “isn’t for us.”

  I followed his gaze.

  Roland laughing loudly with my dad and Arthur. Elara and my mom leaning close over a bundle of clothes like it held the secrets of the universe. Selene was already laughing again beside Elaine.

  “At most,” Fale continued, “we are allowed to view it.”

  His lips curved upward, but it wasn’t joy.

  It was acceptance.

  The kind that comes after losing a long argument to reality.

  “I’ve attended this festival since I was a child,” he said. “Every five years. I’ve watched how happy it makes everyone. But it was never for me to enjoy. It was for me to observe. To understand how to protect their joy for the next time.”

  He turned to me.

  “Even though it isn’t for us, we still enjoy it because of who it’s for.”

  I swallowed.

  “Beric, I am not judging you,” he said gently. “You are undoubtedly the savior of my brother, my sister-in-law, and my niece. I will always be in your debt.”

  My stomach tightened.

  “And though we kept that truth hidden, because revealing it would destroy what trust remains in Roland’s leadership, you must understand. We owe you everything. If it were not for you…” He paused, breath catching faintly. “I do not believe this festival would have happened.”

  Two boys ran past us, shoving each other and laughing, nearly tripping over their own feet.

  “But it was never about recognition,” Fale continued. “You didn’t do it for fame. That’s why you’re standing here.”

  He glanced toward my family.

  “You love them so much that you’re content with it being hidden, as long as they are safe. As long as they can laugh like this, even without you in the center of it, it is enough.”

  The festival. This moment.

  It was enough.

  He looked back at them again.

  “It is enough for us.”

  I didn’t argue.

  “And that is precisely why,” he continued, voice lowering, “while the world cannot always be like this……right now, before us…….I am willing to do whatever it takes to ensure it continues.”

  I didn’t answer. But he knew I agreed.

  “Beric,” he said, tone shifting, “I have something to tell you.”

  I looked at him.

  His expression had hardened.

  “But I need you to keep this a secret. No other soul must know. Not even your family. Especially not my brother.”

  My stomach dropped.

  “The kidnapping of my brother and his family-” He paused, then swallowed. “It was planned.”

  Planned? Hold on. No, seriously. Hold on. You cannot just drop that and expect me to nod politely.

  “I don’t know who was behind it,” he continued, “But there were too many inconsistencies. The public unease regarding Roland’s leadership had been growing, and after the kidnapping, it exploded. It was as if……someone was aiming for it.”

  For what?

  “But thankfully,” Fale went on, “after Earl Wills pushed for a ‘new order,’ public outcry died down.” He sighed. “It happened during the one outing where their guards were reduced,” he said. “It was a secret outing that only a few knew of. The timing was……suspicious.”

  He looked at me directly. “I am grateful that nothing worse occurred because you appeared.”

  He smiled faintly. Then the seriousness returned.

  “That is why I ask for your help once more. There is a strong possibility the perpetrator is closely tied to the nobles. Perhaps even within the inner circle. There may even be more than one.”

  He waited for my answer.

  This is…….a lot. Also, why are you telling a ten-year-old this?

  “Why are you telling me all of this?” I asked bluntly.

  He didn’t react at first, before chuckling softly. “Yes, I expected that question.” He sighed again while gazing out. “At first glance, it is absurd,” he admitted. “But you are capable. I have witnessed your strength. I have heard of your skill against Tao earlier today. More importantly……” His gaze sharpened. “I know how much you love them.” He paused. “And I believe you will protect them.”

  He held my eyes. “If I may trust anyone outside the circle…….. it is you. Can I trust you, Beric?”

  I swallowed.

  I don’t know how he realized I was trying to distance myself from the nobles earlier.

  But he did.

  And instead of taking offense, he acknowledged it.

  “I’ll do my best,” I said firmly.

  I couldn’t let someone aiming for their lives to try it again.

  He smiled. “Thank you.” Then he glanced toward the crowd. “I should return. One never knows who is watching. It would be unwise to linger.”

  And just like that, he stepped away, merging back toward Roland and the others as though he had just gone to the restroom.

  I stayed where I was.

  I already had to worry about the tournament, the other so-called geniuses. and now a potential noble conspiracy.

  I exhaled slowly.

  It had already been a long day.

  I’ll leave it for tomorrow’s Beric to take care of.