Chapter 20

  The shop didn’t have a name, only a sign above it’s door like someone attempted to paint a geometric shape but stopped after outlining it. The space inside rivaled the organization of Oh-jin’s lab minus the hundreds of connecting pipes. There were shelves full of clothing, traveling luggage, excavating equipment and other outdoor survival type gear.

  Used metal armor laid stacked in piles in the corner next to several barrels with leather gear pouring out of them. Weapons were stacked, unorganized leaning against one wall, while the opposite wall was covered in books, scrolls, and wizardry type bobbles. The entire back of the shop had one long counter with what looked to have the ‘good’ items just beyond reach of customers on the other side.

  When Cici had said ‘satyrs’ Kopius had imagined the bottom-half goat, top-half human person-thing. What came to stand on hooved feet behind the long counter was basically a full on goat except for the human looking arms and hands. Upon seeing Cici the goat-man raised his arms, in what Kopus hoped was joy, and bleated in the air. He waved the two over enthusiastically before yelling over his shoulder.

  “JULZ,” the goat shouted, “WE HAVE A CUSTOMER! FETCH THE BOARD!”

  Cici smiled as they approached the man and they all waited, presumably for Julz and whatever the board was. It wasn’t long until another goat-person emerged from the back room, this one with strong feminine leanings, and handed the goat-man a small chalkboard with chalk.

  “HERE YOU ARE!” She yelled at her husband.

  “THANK YOU!” He shouted back.

  The lady satyr smiled and nodded at the two and then left the way she came in. The man started to write on the board creating the only sound in the shop. When Kopius looked at Cici, the big man smiled and nodded as well. The chalk scratched and tapped at the board until he had finished writing and turned to show the two men. It read:

  A welcome return, Mr. Beo. A pleasure. Please introduce your companion and how I may be of service this day.

  The penmanship was fluid and precise. The letters were evenly spaced and written as if by a printer or typewriter. Kopius would need several rulers and some stencils in order to even come remotely close to what the man had simply freehand. He let Cici do the talking, which had been the best approach so far.

  “Faunz,” Cici said with a big smile, “this here is my friend Kopius. He’s not quite sure what he needs but I am here to replenish a few items. I’ll need to restring Luna,” he patted his fanny pack as if to check if it was still there. “I’ll take some lemonsuckle and camiloot. Two extra bowls, a short spoon and something to get this grime off my teeth.” Cici exposed his teeth to show where he was talking about. “I’ll have a look around too,” he added, his finger twirling.

  “JULZ,” Faunz started to shout again. “SUN DRY HORSE TAIL, LEMONSUCKLE, CAMILOOT!”

  Julz screamed the list back to him and then everyone got to work. Faunz collected the non-food items: two metal bowls and a wooden stirring spoon. He placed them both next to a toothbrush looking item. His wife emerged from the back and left her list next to her husband's pile. Faunz picked up the tablet, erased it and started to scribble again. Cici had wandered off to flip through the scrolls and books, while Kopius was looking over at all the used weapons on the other side. Faunz held up the sign to face Kopius:

  What can we help you find?

  Kopius stared at him for a moment. This was odd. It was all odd. The yelling, the writing, goats personified; just weird. He’s not deaf, Kopius tried to reason. He’s obviously not mute either… He paused to look around before pulling his hood over his ears.

  Can you hear me? Kopius thought as he stared at the goat suspiciously. I don’t need any more voices in my head! Okay!? He slid the hood off completely and stepped towards the goat, who retreated slightly. Can you hear me now? Kopius lingered for a second before taking a step back and then pointed to the weapon rack.

  “I could use a weapon or two.” He finally answered. “Some arms and legs protection, nothing heavy though.” Glancing over at Cici, then at the countless books and scrolls made him wonder. Every game he played and every LitRPG he had ever listened to had a shop in the beginning where a person could buy some spells. Mostly low level mind you, but spells nonetheless. “Do you have books to learn magic?”

  Branch? Faunz replied on the board.

  “Air,” Kopius nodded. Faunz gave off a semi-mischievous, we-probably-have-something-for-you smile.

  “Air Elemental,” Cici clarified from a distance. Faunz face turned semi-cross, like a person who had just notice the rash they had was getting worse, not better.

  “Is it that big of a difference?” Kopius pleaded.

  “JULZ!” Faunz screamed. “DO WE HAVE AIR ELEMENTAL TOMES?”

  Kopius jerked back at the sudden loud sound, Cici continued to lull around oblivious to it.

  “THERE IS NO SUCH THING!’ She boomed back through the doorway.

  “NO THING? HOW?” Faunz seemed perplexed.

  Unauthorized content usage: if you discover this narrative on Amazon, report the violation.

  “IT’S A HIGHER LEVEL. HE WOULD HAVE TO READ IT! DOES HE LOOK LIKE HE CAN READ?” Julz responded. Faunz looked him up and down by only moving his eyes.

  “IT’S HARD TO TELL WITH THE DARK AND MOODIES. I’D SAY NO!” Faunz shouted.

  “THIS ONE?” Julz asked, pointing at Kopius, after emerging from the backroom.

  Faunz nodded.

  She looked him up and down as if she was about to bid on him. Her expression didn’t change much. It had started around ‘slightly impressed’ and just stayed there; plus an eyebrow raise or two. When she was done with her inspection she turned back to her husband.

  “THIRD SHELF FROM THE LEFT. TOP SHELF. THERE SHOULD BE A FEW.”

  “THANK YOU,” he yelled at her.

  “THANK YOU,” Kopius yelled at her as well, making both goat people turn in confusion. Faunz picked up the writing tablet and started to jot down what his wife had explained.

  “I got it, I got it,” Kopius waved at the goat-man. “Third from the left, top shelf.”

  Faunz stopped his task but didn’t immediately look up. Julz, who was just about to disappear to the back room, paused in the threshold. Kopius strode over to the shelf and started to look for titles. Nothing was written along the spines of the books so he had to remove them individually and look at the cover. After he placed the third book back, Kopius had the strange feeling that someone was lurking around him.

  “Dude!” Kopius flinched back after looking over his shoulder. Faunz, through some act of total stealth, was standing close enough that Kopius could smell his breath. “Can I help you?!” Kopius asked, taking another defensive step back. Faunz sniffed at him as if he were a familiar odor, like gangrene.

  “ASK HIM.” Julz shouted from behind the long counter, her hands on her hips. They both looked over at the woman and then back at each other.

  “DO YOU SPEAK CAPRIC?” Faunz asked.

  Kopius shook his head in the negative. Looking over to Cici for assistance but the big man was too preoccupied toying around with various gems or crystals; holding them up in the sunlight streaming through the store windows. Kopius was startled, again, when an achievement window popped in his field of view.

  He closed the window to keep focused. Though he had entered the shop under the guise of using his Speakeasy, he had quickly forgotten about it. It all sounded normal to him no matter where they had gone. He had not thought about, much less figured out how to discern between people using Common versus their native language. Now that he was thinking about it, it would have to sit on the backburner for now.

  “HE DOES NOT SPEAK CAPRIC.” Faunz hollered back at his wife.

  “I COULD SEE THAT.” She responded. “I MUST HAVE BEEN MISTAKEN. I APOLOGIZE.”

  “NO APOLOGY NEEDED.”

  “AND I THINK YOU ARE CORRECT,” Julz added. “HE DOESN’T LOOK LIKE THE READING TYPE.”

  “Seriously?” Kopius complained. “I can read, okay! I just prefer not to.”

  “YOU UNDERSTAND!” Julz yelled.

  “HE DOES!” Faunz agreed and clapped his hands together, a big grin on both their billy goat faces.

  “Yes. I do. I can.” Kopius admitted. “I can’t speak it though.”

  “SKILL?” Julz inquired.

  “MAGIC!” Faunz proclaimed.

  “Skill.” Kopius nodded, doing a lazy double-gun finger point at Julz.

  “HOW WONDERFUL!” Faunz beamed. “I DON’T KNOW THE LAST TIME WE HAD A GUEST THAT WE COULD SPEAK WITH.”

  “NEVER.” Julz answered. “IT IS A DIFFICULT LANGUAGE. HARD ON THE THROAT.”

  “Because of all the yelling?” Kopius asked.

  “WHAT YELLING?” Faunz yelled yet still managed to come across deadpan.

  There was a pause as the two goats gave Kopius inquisitive, borderline uncomfortable looks. The couple's veneer soon crumbled and they both started to laugh like bleating farm animals; a well timed joke they had long waited to use. Once Kopius caught up, he couldn’t help but chuckle as well.

  The wife came from behind the counter once the laughter had subsided. She elbowed her husband out of the way, looked at Kopius and then up at the bookshelf. She scanned the blank spines for a moment before removing three books. With the texts under her arm, it was Kopius’s turn to be elbowed out of the way as Julz rifled through a barrel of random scrolls he was standing in front of. Eventually, she summoned everyone back to the counter with her and the gathered items.

  “SCROLLS AND TOMES,” Julz began to lecture. She held up a rolled parchment scroll in one hand and a pamphlet-sized book in the other. “TO LEARN YOU MUST ONLY IMBUE WITH A MINIMAL AMOUNT OF MANA. THE SPELL IS ABSORBED, ITEMS DESTROYED, AND THEN YOU CAN USE IT; NO READING NEEDED. SPELL BOOKS,” Julz picked up one of the three large text books, “THEY REQUIRE MORE ATTENTION. A HIGHER POSITION OF UNDERSTANDING.”

  She flipped through the pages and they caught a glimpse of different charts, diagrams and written word. To Kopius it looked like someone's scientific dissertation that they had spent a few years writing and detailing. The size of these books made the ones that Oh-jin had given him look like serialized comics. He picked up one of the magic books and felt like he could use it to assault someone given its heft. Only his college textbooks rivaled what was in his hands now and Cory had only picked those up the night before any major exam.

  “SCROLL, TOME, SPELL BOOK,” Julz said as she laid down one of each on the counter in front of them. “ALL OF THESE ARE BRANCH MAGIC; FIRE SPELL. SAME SPELL. THIS ONE IS CALLED ‘FLARE.’ THE SCROLL WILL GRANT YOU ‘WEAK FLARE’; START CAMPFIRES OR IGNITE A SMALL FORGE. TOMES ARE A STEP HIGHER THAN THE SCROLLS; A CASTER CAN SET ABLAZE FROM ACROSS A ROOM. BOTH HAVE LOW INTELLIGENCE THRESHOLDS AND ARE LIMITED IN GROWTH POTENTIAL AND POWER.”

  Kopius was listening but found it hard to concentrate. Being lectured wasn't anything new. He had never enjoyed the experience but also understood there was some value to it. He was learning something after all; it was the shouting. The yelling had not only been the straw to break his back but it also beat at him with the type of authority only the LAPD could get behind. Cory had endured countless yellings from his family, coaches, fellow road-ragers, cellmates, CO’s, customers, pets, ex-girlfriends, girlfriends before they were ex’s…

  Holy shit, man. Kopius had a sudden realization. I could keep going…

  Cory had yelled back in many of those incidents but the situation here was a lot different. To begin with, the yelling wasn’t fueled by anger or frustration or any other negative position. It was more like being at a family BBQ where everyone is having conversations at higher than normal volumes because your cousin is testing the limits of his speaker system. Enduring the noise had reached its limit. As much as Koius tried to mask the flogging his brain was taking, he began to involuntary wince at each spoken word.

  “You guys have earplugs or anything like that,” Kopius eventually interrupted. He made cupping gestures on his ears to further explain what he was requesting.

  “OF COURSE, SIR!” Faunz responded and started to look through various shelves before producing an item that had a strong resemblance to earmuffs. The headband with two fluffy circular ends was too small and may have been designed for a child. Kopius adjusted it so that it sat on his face like a football helmet chinstrap.

  “Does this suffice?” Faunz inquired.

  “Perfect,” Kopius replied with some relief and two thumbs up. “Thanks.”