Goofy

The Proper Palin

Clearly, McCain misspoke. He meant to say Michael Palin. Here is a video detailing Michael Palin’s qualifications as a true candidate for Vice President of the United States:

Oddly, it makes no mention of his foreign policy experience. As a resident of England, which borders two different countries, Michael has the same amount of international relations [...]

Strange Dream

Last night, by the way, I dreamed that I had to improvise an opera about being buried alive.  And naked.
All I can figure is that it’s a conspiracy between Sigmund Freud, Edgar Allen Poe, and Wayne Brady to control my dreams.

A Nautical, Musical Treasure

Awhile ago, my musical friend Stephen Whitehead sent me this nautical treat:

I SO want to write a story about pirates now!  But The Solitude of the Tentacled Space Monster calls…
(And a PS to those reading this on my LJ.  The MP3 enclosure doesn’t seem to have translated properly.  I’m still trying to figure out how [...]

Glinda: Good Witch of the North, or Machiavellian Mastermind?

For various reasons, my mom and my little sister were involved in a community theater production of The Wizard of Oz over past few weeks, and last night Jennifer and I went down to see the show.  The production was so-so.  Production values were high, with good costumes and a reasonably tolerable orchestra, and most [...]

Avast, ye scurvies! Scuttle the web! Arr!

Today is officially Talk Like a Pirate day. It’s a lot more fun when this day falls on a workday, so that I can run around my office telling the other developers that they’re scurvy lads and lasses. Alas, I’ll have to settle for wandering around church doing the same thing. That’ll go over well [...]

Trans-Specific Chicken

We were all eating lunch — a feast from Taco Bell delivered to the training site by one of our team — when M., one of my fellow mollusk trainers, made an important discovery.

“Hey!” she said, outraged. “This isn’t chicken in my taco. It’s steak!”

“Impossible,” said N., with a look of [...]

From the Secret Diary of…

There have been many times when I’ve been in the house by myself, and heard a noise coming from upstairs that sounds just like typing. This often happens late at night, when Jennifer’s asleep and I’m downstairs reading, or during the day when Jennifer is at work and I’m puttering around the house doing chores [...]

Unappreciated

There are times when I’m afraid that Jennifer just doesn’t appreciate me enough. In response to this entry in her journal, and her calling me a "beanhead" earlier this evening, I created this picture for her:

And this:

And, the piece de resistance:

…which is truly my masterpiece.
And my wife looks [...]

G Words

Gray, Spalding. Spalding Gray turns 59 years old today. In honor of that occasion, I’ll let you know that every event in this journal entry is true, except for the part about the grapes.

Gout. With which I was officially diagnosed today. Well, not really officially. And not just today. Last year when I had a [...]